Since Stephen became self-employed in 2004, we have paid for our own medical coverage. We do not get reimbursed by the company for this expense every month. We pay out-of-pocket cash for our monthly premium which has never been below $500 a month. It is average coverage, but it is coverage.

It is a write-off when tax season rolls around, but everyone has that same benefit.

In October 2007 we found out I was pregnant with baby number 3. We had above mentioned health insurance, but it did not include maternity. Maternity was an 'add-on' (upwards of $200+ in addition to our $500+ a month premium) and could only be added to a policy every January. If we had even thought we were going to get pregnant, we probably would have added the maternity coverage that previous winter, but we didn't.
And to be honest, we really didn't have the extra $200+ a month to include the maternity coverage. Yup, I was the dreaded 'pre-existing' condition.

(So much for letting nature take its' course, huh? You better know in January that you might get pregnant that following fall...and pay $200+ a month from January through the fall even though you are not yet pregnant...we were a little baffled to say the least.)

So, we freaked out. Then we got our heads on straight and made a game plan. Looked at our monthly budget, cut costs where we could, found things to sell, and low and behold we paid for prenatal visits, labor and delivery (in a hospital) in CASH.

Here is something that shocked us in this process. Our OB office actually charged us HALF of what they charge insurance carrying patients. They were so relieved not having to deal with the insurance companies policies and procedures.
And it was the best pregnancy, labor and delivery/hospital stay because I had full say on everything, no insurance company dictating my every move.

So, as most of you know, while I was delivering beautiful baby Jackson, Stephen was cross town in another hospital with cellulitis in his elbow. His stay was the same amount of time as mine, his situation WAS covered by our health insurance and he came home with a $12,000 bill, which we soon were told we owed close to half.

I remember opening that bill and having my first mental breakdown. How in the world were we going to pay that? We were trying to sell a house, move, raise 3 small children and only one of us worked??!!

Again, after the freak out and after speaking with the hospital, we got our heads on straight and made a game plan. We were put on a payment plan and for a year, we owed close to $350 to the hospital for an incident that was 'covered'.

We again cut our monthly expenses, sold things, and paid that $350 a month.

September 2009 we made our final payment. It was a huge relief, and an even bigger accomplishment.

So in reading all of this, you would think I believe health care needs to be reformed. You are absolutely right. I was so ticked when Blue Cross Blue Shield told me I was pre-existing as a maternity patient and that no coverage was available. Even more ticked that our $500 a month premium left us still paying close to half of Stephen's medical stay at Wake Med.

But that is not the moral of THIS story. For 6 years, we have paid $500+ a month for health insurance. That is over $36,000. Money that could have been well spent someplace else. But we made a choice. A CHOICE to cover our family. A sacrifice to make sure our needs are (mostly) met medically, in case something happens. That money is hard earned, and sometimes doesn't feel well spent. But we do it because we know the consequences. Someone else will pay for our medical needs when it is not their responsibility.

And we were not raised that way.

I worked at a Rescue Mission. I understand that people are in need. I know situations arise that are unforeseen and can't be avoided. I comprehend that our meager $12,000 hospital stay doesn't even compare to a family dealing with a MAJOR medical issue like cancer, where bills can be $100,000+. And I do have a heart.

But I will not stand by and let the government rob me with taxes to give healthcare to people who don't give a damn about their health, who choose to spend money elsewhere rather than investing in health insurance.
And who is to say with this current reform our premiums won't go up? Or that our coverage won't get worse? I know our family can't really handle either of those situations.

We don't have money trees growing in our backyard, but by CHOICE we have paid our monthly health insurance premium as well as the overages mentioned above. Have we missed out on things because of these costs? ABSOLUTELY. But we were taught to be responsible for ourselves and our actions and wish to teach our children the same.

Handouts to the wrong hands perpetuate the cycle of laziness, lack of responsibility, utter dependence and abuse of government agencies. And I HATE that my name will be on this, my handouts will allow this cycle to continue.