The game changer

It takes time to build friendships.
Acquaintances are easy, find a hobby and you immediately have people to talk to, meet with once in awhile. But deep friendships take time and commitment and not many people make/have time for that any more nor are they willing to put themselves out there, to take chances on what may or may not come of it.

After Stephen and I married, we started attending a church in San Diego that we really liked. Thought we might find some "couple" friends there, so we attended a class for young married couples.

When asked a little bit about our backgrounds, Stephen and I, along with one other couple, were the only ones in the room that did not come from missionary families, nor did we have the Bible memorized from front to back. We felt isolated and kind of rejected, looked down upon.

The other couple felt the same way we did. We sought each other out at church (never going back to the young married group) and we started doing things together. Hockey games, seeing a movie, having dinner at one another's homes.

One night the husband knocked on our door, he was alone. They were coming over for dinner and we didn't quite understand why the wife wasn't by his side. The husband asked if I would go talk to the wife in their car, they were in the middle of a disagreement.

Wife and I sat in their car and talked for a long time. She confided in me, cried to me, that night was a game changer in our friendship. From that night forward, we knew we could count on one another, we had each other's backs. Through thick and thin, our friendship would endure.

Today I am reminded of that night that wife took a leap of faith to let her guard down and talk openly and honestly about the difficulties of marriage, to open up to an almost perfect stranger, and not in a needy way, but transparent, asking for a friendship to help her through a difficult moment and continue on that journey for years to come.